Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Enjoyable High Holiday Services for Your Family



An interesting fax came across my desk this week (yes, some people still do fax things). In it was a short blurb, "How To Make Your Synagogue Experience More Meaningful". It listed some good ideas:

1. If a particular sentence or paragraph touches you--linger a while. Allow the words to touch you.

2. Five minutes of prayer said with feeling understanding and personal connection to the words and their significance means far more than five hours of lip service.

3. As you sit in your synagogue on the High Holidays, you are joined by millions of Jews all over the world.

These were some good ideas, but they got me thinking about how I (really, we, my husband does play a large role in this) make our synagogue experience meaningful for us and for our chidren.

Here's some of what we do:

1. We begin talking about each holiday BEFORE it happens. We do this mostly with great Jewish story books at bedtime (I have a connection). We listen to holiday kids music (there are a lot of great ones out there, even on YouTube). If they bring home a holiday related craft project or drawing from school, we hang it up as decoration on the refirgerator or even laminate it as a placemat to use at all meals. We talk about listening to the shofar blown during the service and what other things could happen.

2. We sign up for everyone to attend a serice that is age appropiate for them. For us, we take advantage of childcare at temple during the adult services and then attend the family service all together (including the grandparents!) in the afternoons. When the kids were younger, we went to the tot program together. Pictured above is my daughter practicing blowing shofar on the bimah. Some temples have childrens services that invite the kids up to particiapte. Take advantage of this opportunitites, it gets them excited. And as my rabbi always says, a good 15 minute temple experience for your child is better than an hour of you hushing them and making them sit down.

3. On the way home from synagogue and at the table for lunch, we discuss what happened and the themes in the service. We ask them: What did you pray for during the silent meditation? Why do you think we went outside and tossed bread into the canal? Who would like to help fill up this empty shopping bag with cans for the food pantry at temple?

It sounds simple, but I know that it does take some effort to make services a more meaningful experience. Think about your own synagogue experience as child. For me, I remember my parents "patting down" my brother before each service to make sure he wasn't smuggling in a toy or even food (on Yom Kippur, no less!) in his suit or in his socks. This makes me laugh now but at the time, I saw how stressful it was for my parents. I want my children to have a spiritual life of their own, a connection to G-d and their religion. And I think positive synagogue experiences are good start.